Picking Up a Girl at the Bar

We struggle so hard to co-exist with girls. But it's like a gorilla trying to be a companion to a talking banana. Sure, the Gorilla will try to listen to the banana, but really all the Gorilla will think about is how he wants to eat the banana. The banana will natter away in it's banana talk and the Gorilla will salivate. The banana will get upset cause the gorilla isn't really listening and doesn't appreciate the gorilla trying to peel it.

Eventually the banana will squeeze through the bars and tell the gorilla (in it's banana voice) to quit playing with his own feces and take a hike. Gorilla upset. How often do you see a talking banana!?

Now here is my advice to the gorilla:

  1. You'll feel silly, but talk to the other bananas (even though they aren't a talking banana) - Talking bananas feed off competition.
  2. Eat a little of the rotten bananas that you left in the corner - Again, creates competition.
  3. Hide your hunger. Oddly enough, bananas are interested when you're not.
  4. Drinking your own pee is a cool trick with the other Gorillas. Bananas will not understand.
  5. And lastly, show the banana a Lion and tell the banana it's yours.