Parker’s daily Buddhist wisdom:

The Buddha was invited by a Brahman to have a meal in his house. But when he arrived, the Brahman greeted him strangely, with a torrent of abuse.

Politely, the Buddha asked, “Do visitors come to your home, good Brahman?”
“Yes.”
“What preparations do you make for them?”
“We get ready a great feast.”
”What happens if they don’t arrive?”
“Then we gladly eat it ourselves.”

“Well, Brahman, you’ve invited me for a meal and you’ve entertained me with hard words. I want nothing from your preparation. So please take it back and eat it yourselves.”

“Never retaliate in kind,” the Buddha told his followers. “Hatred does not come to an end through hatred but can only cease through generosity.”

Parker’s version:

So get this …this so called Brahman (spiritual man) invites the fucking Buddha to his house for some KD and starts putting him down?

This is like a catholic priest inviting Jesus Christ over for some good times, but starts in on the poor guy. “Hey Jesus, I heard this one the other day… Jesus…I mean you….walks into an inn with a handful of nails and says to the owner ‘could you put me up for the night?’ Hiiiilarity …umm soooo did that happen? Just kiddin JC I got a million of them…

What kinds of hosts are these I guess is the underlying issue? I’m going to invite some of my black friends over for some good ol cross burning??? Shit no!!

The point is your guest is being a total turd to you and you want to feed him his teeth for dessert. But this would be wrong my troubled friend.

The best thing is to leave and not get angry, but have a catchy line on the way out. Buddha gave this guy a pretty good dig, but I think something like “How about you gargle my berries knobwalker.” would work just as nicely. Maybe leave him a burning bag of shit on his porch on the way out as well….but this can cross into a grey area.

Best to have some good lines handy and leave any violence out of it.